January 17, 2012
Woman Protests Non-Jewish Woman’s Burial in an Synagogue-Owned Interfaith Plot
The question of who belongs in a place like the Colchester Jewish Aid Congregation Cemetery is growing more complex as interfaith families are more accepted in Jewish American life.
Following this lead from Jews in All Hues: In Connecticut, A Woman Sues to Expel a Black Woman’s Body from a Jewish Cemetery,according to the Associated Press. Juliet Steer was buried two years ago at the Colchester Jewish Aid Congregation Cemetery in a section that was reserved for interfaith and non-Jews, according to Congregation Ahavath Achim. But one member of the board of directors, Maria Balaban, is suing to have Steer’s remains removed, despite allegedly being present the day that the ruling was unanimously voted in. A gleaning of the quotes, which most interest me, as a “mixie” Jew:
Purtill said the interfaith cemetery was the result of the changing structure of families and the increase in interfaith and other types of relationships, including unmarried couples and civil unions. Congregation rules say burial plots in the interfaith section can be bought “by an individual for any individual without regard to religious identity.”
… Traditional Jewish laws and practices prohibit the burial of non-Jews in Jewish cemeteries, said David Berger, dean of the Bernard Revel Graduate School of Jewish Studies of Yeshiva University in New York City. “Jews should be buried with other Jews.
There is such an expectation,” Berger said. But the number of interfaith cemeteries is increasing, he said, because there are more marriages between people of different faiths.
As the child of a Jewish mother and Catholic father, the question of death rituals holds more uncertainty for me than it might for others. My parents currently have no plans, but they have discussed non-denominational and non-religious interfaith cemeteries. For me, should I remain unmarried (or should I marry a non-Jew, but that’s personally unlikely,) the question becomes—do I want to be buried with my parents? Do I want to be buried, without family, in a Jewish cemetery? Do I want to do something else?
For Steer, who was a non-Jew with no Jewish family, her decision rested on the peacefulness she felt in the cemetery. She died at 47 of cancer, may her memory be for a blessing.
The logistics of this case seem pretty cut and dry to me, unlike the complex issues of interfaith families in Jewish communities. The congregation voted to allow non-Jewish plots this section; Steer had every right to be buried there. If Balaban has an issue with this, then she should move to change the rules for future buyers. The prospect of exhuming Steer’s body is distasteful, even without the added race sensitivities. Personally, I hope that the media attention has made Balaban realize the insensitivity of her lawsuit, and encouraged her to look for a more respectful way to present her opinions to her community. As it stands, a court date is scheduled for Feb. 29.
To keep up with this story, check out the Jews in all Hues Facebook page, where they are looking to get in contact with the local Jewish community.
December 21, 2011
Religious Coexistence in America and Westeros
I remember once in Hebrew School, we were asked to think up our own religions. Perhaps, as a largely interfaith congregation, this was meant to be easy for us, since our families often “created” out of two or more traditions. At the time, I drew a blank. I was completely baffled, slightly by the assignment, but more out of my inability, as a “mixie” child and a creative writer, to think of anything.
Now, I find myself thinking of fake religions all the time, meaning sci-fi and fantasy, not anyone who happens to follow a different path than Judaism. 
Since last spring’s premiere of Game of Thrones on HBO, I’ve become more and more hooked. Although season two is still months away, buzz remains high as the show has been nominated for several prestigious awards and loyal fans follow the crew around the world during production. One of the latest teases comes from HBO marketing and Winter-is-Coming.net—a short, academic video on the two major religions of Westeros. The narrators are GoT actors Michelle Fairley and Isaac Hempstead-Wright, who play two of my absolute favorite characters in this sprawling series, Lady Catelyn Stark and her son, Bran. An added, geeky note is that these two characters can be stand-ins for the two religions. As I blogged in April, the Starks are “interfaith,” with Catelyn hailing from the Riverlands where The Seven are worshipped. In contrast, and not to get into too many book spoilers here, there are arguments that can be made linking Bran strongly with the Old Gods. I’ve embedded the video below:
Tonight marks the first night of Chanukah 5772. I may be biased in trying to find a parallel between Jews and the North of Westeros, home of the Starks, but there is a similarity between these two stories; one where “The Andals” attack from across the seas, the other where the Ancient Greeks attack Jerusalem. For one of the rare times in Jewish history, we’re actually able to defeat our attackers and stay true to our beliefs, thus creating Chanukah, or “dedication.”
But the days of the Ancient Greeks are long over. In this day and age Chanukah is seen as a very minor holiday, only bolstered up because of its proximity to Christmas. Instead of being about victory, it’s more about coexistence with other religions, especially when it comes to interfaith families like mine. Night five of Chanukah will be occurring when little reindeer fly overhead this year.
It’s something I can live with. Like with the Old Gods in Westeros, Jews are the minority in most parts of the world; peaceful diversity is a worthy goal. And for those of us in mixed families, we have our own paths to take with creating new rituals while remaining dedicated to Judaism. But life is multi-faceted that way. Perhaps that’s why fiction is, too.
November 26, 2011
Rumpelstiltskin and Antisemitism in Fairytales
Rumpelstiltskin (Robert Carlyle) and the Evil Contract
So the other week, I watched an episode of ABC’s “Once Upon A Time,” featuring a desperate servant who wanted a better life for herself, and the sniveling, conniving imp who granted her that wish with the caveat that they had to make a “deal,” which ultimately constituted selling her firstborn child. As the traumatized maiden tried to renege, the jubilant fiend entrapped her with the nefarious contract, brrr! You owe me a debt! A pound of flesh! As I watched, I started wondering to myself if I was visiting my Ashkenazi relatives in the Russian Empire 100 or so years ago, and some Cossacks were rallying support to pillage the Jewish village because they couldn’t make good on a merchant’s deal.
The episode I speak of, “The Price of Gold,” combines two fairytales; that of Cinderella (where instead of being transformed by her Fairy Godmother, Ella strikes a deal with Rumpy,) and Rumpelstiltskin’s own fairtale, where he helps another innocent maiden out for the price of her firstborn child. Killing Christian babies is one of medieval Christendom’s favorite accusations to hurl against the Jews. Apparently there’s nothing quite so yummy for our matzo than their blood. :-/
So let’s review! Specifically taking into account the tale of Rumpelstiltskin.
- Fairytale that originated in medieval Germany? Check.
- Compiled in a book by 18th/19th century German storytellers, the Brothers Grimm? Check.
- Sniveled, hook-nosed villain with difficult-to-pronounce name (meaning “little rattle stilt,” basically a type of goblin)? Check.
- Includes passages where it’s implied that Rumpy will cook the baby? Check.
- Quite possibly twisted into Nazi, nationalist propaganda, along with the rest of the Grimm tales, during WWII? Check.
Even “Once Upon a Time,” written in 21st century United States by two Jewish writers, no less, isn’t exactly sensitive with the subject. What is the name of Rumpelstilktsin’s alter ego in Story Brooke? Mr. Gold. (Is that Goldberg or Goldstein, fellas? ;D) Though to be fair, the “Gold” surname may be a flashback to Rumpy’s own story where he promises to spin straw into gold for the miller’s daughter.
Still, the powerful, mysterious Mr. Gold still likes making deals for babies and is even a broker (one of those jobs that was considered immoral and off-limits for medieval Christians, so the Jews were forced into it, because hey, we’re already evil anyway. ;D)
Despite all this, “Once Upon a Time” has caught my attention in spades. Featuring a highly female cast of both heroes and villains, it probes the ideas of family, happiness and fate in a unique and tangible way. And Rumpelstiltskin/Mr. Gold, played by the incredible, Scottish actor Robert Carlyle, is perhaps more intriguing than he is offensive.
2012 promises to be The Year of Snow White in film, which such numbers is Snow White and the Huntsman (starring Kristen Stewart who is hopefully distancing herself from the simpering chew toy named Bella Swan,) and Mirror Mirror (starring Julia Roberts being deliciously evil.) But so far, I’m perfectly happy with 2011 and “Once Upon a Time,” starring the beautiful, talented (and Jewish!) Ginnifer Goodwin as Snow White. Check out this tv trailer!
“Once Upon a Time” airs on ABC, Sunday nights at 8 pm EST.
October 30, 2011
The “Occupy” Movement: Bridging Judaism with the American Economic System, for Better or Worse
Screenshot from the "Occupy Judaism" Facebook page
I took some time earlier this month to read through some “Occupy Wall Street [and beyond]” materials circulating the Internet.
I suppose because I’m fresh off of long-term unemployment with little to no benefits, the whole idea intrigues me. I just can’t believe that the economic crisis can be boiled down to “you’re all a bunch of lazy asses” when unemployment/underemployment is this huge, and the differentiation between the income made by the top 1% and everyone else is so staggering. I thought we were a democratic capitalist society, not a medieval feudalist state. Perhaps the only difference is what were once churches and monarchies are now banks and corporations.
Yet most people seem to think “the message” of Occupy Wall Street is unclear. On The Daily Show, Jon suggested that some protestors might want to question America’s Israel policies, which I think is a shame. Not that they shouldn’t be questioned—I agree with that myself—but they should be done so in a structured and mediated environment that speaks to the complex issues at hand, and besides, what does Israel have to do with keeping Americans out of work? (Maybe I can convince myself that Americans actually understand that Israelis are a lot like us, lol.) But really, the movement seems to be largely about domestic jobs and taxes, with a few crazies thrown in on the side.
Other than on-site protests, Tumblr seems to be the major agent of this movement. Starting with We are the 99 Percent, where the masses can post about their economic troubles. In response, some Conservatives thought up the 53 percent, which is supposed to chronicle those “patriotic” folks who pay more in Federal income taxes than they receive in deductions or credits, except that most of the people posting their “get over it, losers” comments don’t actually fit that profile, prompting the satire blog, Actually, you’re the 47 percent. Though to be fair, probably the majority of the posters who contribute to We Stand with the 99 Percent aren’t actually members of the uber-wealthy 1 percent, though they all seem to be well off. It’s quite a harrowing contrast, really… between the folks who say “I’m fortunate and I want to help out where I can” versus those who say “F*ck y’all whiners; nobody owes you shit.”
A Jewish faction is also responding to the “Occupy” Movement with their own Tumblr, plus various tie-ins with current holidays…were some Kol Nidre services at some of the protests, and some sukkahs for Sukkot. It makes a whole lot of sense to me that this has taken off, particularly with younger, activist groups who are somewhat disillusioned with synagogues and Federations (though perhaps unjustly in this case, since both groups do engage in philanthropy. Then again, the “Occupy” theme is more hands-on…kind of like Rabbi Abraham Joshua Heschel and his congregants marching with MLK Jr. Maybe we are just reborn hippies. )
On the opposite side of the pendulum, some (political) Conservative Jews be freakin’. Was only a matter of time before some right-wing columnist threw out the word “antisemitic.” Which frankly I think is a big problem on so many different fronts that I’m completely baffled. Crying “antisemitism” over any and all disagreements is so much more serious a problem for the Jews than any social protest. The right wing Jews are paranoid…about anyone who might be anti-Israel, about anyone who might equate banks or other “rich professions” with Jews, about anyone who isn’t us, basically. I mean, I get it to an extent. Fear of antisemitism might be ingrained in us…it’s a very real danger our ancestors have had to deal with for millennia, even in this country and even to this day. But we can’t be so afraid of the past to keep us from embracing the future. We (most of us) see ourselves as part of the broader American society…we are part of the broader American society, so that means we have the responsibility to look at real problems without calling foul based on old stereotypes. Yeah, so Jews have a “reputation” for becoming rich bankers or whatnot…but the vast majority of us are in the 99 percent. I fully believe that most Americans understand that. As for the xenophobic nutcases who don’t…I’m not into giving them more power. JewSchool.com offers a rebuttal to “the right winger who cried antisemitism” argument, Jewish participation in the “Occupy” movement, plus a Torah argument for people coming together in mutli-purpose social activism. Yasher koach!
September 30, 2011
“Xena” and the Power of Repentance
Xena: Warrior Princess as played by Lucy Lawless
When I arrived late to Rosh Hashanah (Day Two) services today, barely in time to hear Rabbi Steinlauf’s new year’s sermon at Adas Israel, I didn’t think that I’d be moved to write my monthly blog entry on “Xena: Warrior Princess.” …even if I did stay up too late last night, re-watching old episodes.
I’ve been joking that missing Rosh Hashanah (Day One) services yesterday would be my last sin before Yom Kippur. It helps keep some of the guilt at bay. Instead of attending High Holidays I went to my new job and my new school program. In a lot of ways I feel prepped for Rosh Hashanah this year. My life is full of motifs of new beginnings (see above) and new endings. Right now I’m struggling with the loss of a community that sustained me for six years, and the changing relationships with my friends within that group. I’m also still in the year of mourning for my grandmother, Fraida bat Reuven, who died last March, may her memory be for a blessing. Rosh Hashanah teaches me to remember the old, but to embrace the new. It’s a message of faith that is somewhat alien to me, but that I want to aspire to.
Yom Kippur asks me to take a critical look at my past and to atone for my sins, something with which I have a little more affinity. But the message is that through repentance, you can come out clean on the other side.
“Xena: Warrior Princess” revolves around a focal character who longs to repent for a long and bloody history as a warlord. She accomplishes this through what Jews might call teshuvah, or action. She retains her fighting ways, but she puts them to use in defending the innocent.
In the beginning she doesn’t have much faith that she’ll be forgiven. She’s cynical, and she does these things basically because she sees them as the right thing to do. It is when she finds community, through quirky characters like Hercules, Salmoneos, Atolycus, Joxer the Mighty and most especially Gabrielle, her erstwhile friend turned besheret, or soul mate, that she regains hope for her soul. This is the way it is in Judaism as well. We have no Catholic confessionals from which to confess our sins alone and in private. Jews atone as a group, called by the shofar to stand with each other and to take responsibility for one another.
At the end of the series Xena is literally able to transcend to a new plane of consciousness, which I suppose, on a less fantastical level, is the purpose of the High Holy Days. Who will be written off and who will be inscribed in the Book of Life?, we ask. Who will fall prey to their past mistakes and who will learn from them and be lifted up to something better? Like with Xena, who spent at least half of her life instilling terror across the world, it is never too late to atone.
Stay tuned next time for the Jewish/sci-fi cross-over when I discuss “Farscape”’s John Crichton’s quest for home and how it relates to the Passover story! 
L’shanah tovah—happy new year to all of my Jewish family, and may we all be inscribed in the Book of Life.
August 30, 2011
Personal History: A Jewish College in an Alternate Dimension
Sukkot with the Chestertown Havurah, October 2003
A few weeks ago, I received a newsletter in the mail that boggles me to this very day. Was the first official issue from my college Hillel.
When I decided to attend Washington College around 10 years ago, I pretty much accepted that I was foregoing a Jewish community in favor of a creative writing minor in the middle of rural Maryland. Sure, larger schools in more diverse, urban areas offer fiction writing courses, but not The Lit House or The Sophie Kerr Prize. That, plus the incredible people that I met made my college experience rich and fortunate.
However, my one regret was that there wasn’t much Jewish life to speak of. Our big staples, a Chanukah party and a Passover Seder, were really organized by the local Havurah, and they were kind enough to invite college students. Sometimes a handful of students would attend (particularly the seder, which was held on school property), but it was mostly a “townie” event. Hillel was small and basically dormant. I served as treasurer for two years—a sure sign that the club didn’t attract many people in my day. As a senior I tried, fruitlessly, to organize a challah-baking event. Most interest I received came from my non-Jewish friends rather than the sparse members of Hillel.
Since I’ve been gone, apparently, a lot has changed. According to this premiere newsletter, WAC’s new “Program of Jewish Thought” is teaming up with St. John’s College, Princeton and Hebrew University for two annual symposia a year, new library research opportunities into Jewish studies, and a month-long winter course in Jerusalem. Whoa. I mean I was fortunate enough to take two Jewish courses on philosophy and literature my senior year, but this… *boggles*
Oh, and Hillel is getting a Hillel House in the middle of Chestertown. A Hillel House? When I was attending, there were barely enough members to fill a thimble! What’s changed? Perhaps these new programs will compel more outwardly Jewish students to my small little alma mater of under 2,000? Or is this mostly for the Havurah? Is there any way I can push these innovations back 10 years, just before I was a student?
Life is full of tiny regrets…only thing you can do is keep moving forward. I’m starting a second graduate program in Library Sciences next week, with the plan of adding electives in Jewish Studies at the slightly more established UMD school. Difference between urban and rural for Jews, man.
In the meantime, I’m debating how I should reach out to WAC Hillel and the new Program. Even as an alumna, there may be ways to be involved… time permitting. Maybe my new studies could even propel me into an academic role.
To close, a hearty mazel tov to the Jewish community, student and Havurah alike, at Washington College. May these new initiatives bear fruit and bring Jewish pride to even the “cornfieldiest” parts of Maryland.
July 30, 2011
Wiccans and Vampire Catholics Join the Kooky Crowd at “True Blood”
Religious, cultural and philosophical questions are really just a backdrop to the important story of the love rectangle between The Pretty People.
Oh, what can one say about HBO’s hit urban fantasy series, “True Blood”? The undead have recently “come out of the coffin,” sustained by a synthetic blood energy drink, and the main premise of the show (besides ogling hot, supernatural co-eds) is to equate the civil rights/gay rights struggle to a “vampire rights” struggle.
And it works for awhile—religious extremists can always be made to sound ridiculous, no matter their intended target—until you realize that vampires, in fact, do suck the blood of your children, unlike gay people.
Season four introduces the theme of “witches,” so called by the vampires and the Christian populace of fictional Bon Temps, Louisiana, in actuality a Wiccan prayer group that meets at Moon Goddess Emporium. And uh oh—they’ve just learned necromancy, or how to control the dead! This understandably concerns the vampire community, which had some bad experiences with necromancers during the 16th century, so they send one of their own to break up the group. Except, of course, that these witches are necromancers, so they erase the vamp’s memory. Hey, coulda done much worse.
The Wiccan leader, Marnie, has a bee in her bonnet about the vampires trying to break them up. “We have a right to practice our religion!” this American patriot says. …except, of course, that they don’t have the right to use their faith to literally take away free will. (Which I’m thinking is the argument some atheists use concerning real religious practice.) Just sayin’. Once again, the allegory falls a little short.
The deal with Vampire Catholics is that vampires joined the priesthood and the nunnery in order to have easy access to women to condemn as witches and suck the lives from in secret. (No word, yet, how many, if any of these women were actual witches, I’m not sure the vamps really cared one way or another. Food is food here.) I have to say…as a Jew, I find this to be bitterly ironic. The Spanish Inquisition, even more than a witch-hunt, was largely an effort to purge “secret Jews” from Catholic Spain, by means of torture and death. To my understanding (and meaning no disrespect to my own paternal Italian Catholic family,) the Catholics were evil bloodsuckers looking to drain Jewish lives and identities from my maternal forebears. I’m speaking of medieval Catholicism, of course. The Church has recently recanted and apologized….after 400 years. (In all seriousness, a brave and integral move towards reconciliation and religious harmony in the modern day, so kudos.)
Another amusing point is that much of vampire folklore was perpetrated by the Catholic Church and it’s obsession with damnation. What a post-modern conceit, then, to put these demonic creatures inside the very institution that reviled them. I’d be very interested to get a Catholic perception on this twist.
I’d also love to hear from Wiccan practitioners about how they feel their religion is being handled on the show.
All in all, “True Blood” is a show that you have to take with a grain of salt. American minorities do not seek to suck the blood of “majority” children the way that vampires do; religious practitioners do not seek to hurt others or take free will the way these necromancer witches do. It’s a cute story for some romantic escapism, not a serious discussion on philosophy and values.
…with all that being said, this clip from season two (where an elderly vampire decides that it’s his time to go,) may be the most beautiful narrative on faith in G-d and personal salvation that I’ve ever seen on television. Two years later, I remain very moved.
“True Blood,” based on the Sookie Stackhouse book series by Charlaine Harris, airs on HBO at 9 pm Sunday nights.
June 30, 2011
Italian/Kosher Intersection; Adult Children of Interfaith Marriage Leading Volunteerism!
Yours truly at the Roman Jewish Ghetto last year.
I’m used to getting bombarded by media pitches via email on Jewish subjects, since I write a good deal about Judaism. It’s a rarer occasion for my fellow Italians or their reps to seek me out.
But recently, I got wind of something that combined the two! From July 10-12, the annual Fancy Food Show will be coming to the Washington Convention Center in DC. Featuring a variety of delicacies from 80 countries I was specifically contacted about Italy’s contributions—including a lecture on culinary traditions with Barbara Seelig-Brown, the host of PBS’ Stress Free Cooking, and smaller seminars as well.
The one that particularly caught my attention was “Kosher for Everyone,” being held Monday at the Italian Embassy, 5:30 pm, where expert Bill Marsano will speak about Italian contributions to the U.S. kosher market. More than detailing the customs of Italian Jews, however, the event is co-sponsored by the Ministry of Economic Development and the Trade Commission, ergo about international relations between countries and the chance to seize upon a sizable U.S. market. (Kosher ain’t just for the Jews anymore. )
Unfortunately I’ll be out of town that weekend, but I wanted to plug this fascinating (and yummy) event! And since the Italian Jewish community isn’t the specific focus of the weekend, I figured I’d add a few cultural links as well…the Internet is chock-full of “kosher Italian” recipes but for something more old school, try one of these variety of cookbooks available on Amazon.com! And for those of us not skilled in the kitchen, perhaps a trip to New York is in order…Va Bene and Tevere restaurants both feature foods from Jewish Rome. I’m salivating!
Kosher-style ethnic food options are cropping up everywhere as well; close to home for me is Siena’s Restaurant of Italian and Mexican foods. Search on Google for your local area (or local cosmopolitan city, at least ) and I imagine you’ll find a few!
In completely unrelated news, just wanted to garner attention to this study, as highlighted by InterfaithFamily.com; turns out in a recent review of volunteerism trends among Jewish young adults, those of us from dual-heritage families are leading the pack! :-O Mazel tov to my fellow mixies! Certainly gives me the urge to find a new mitzvah project.
May 26, 2011
Religion as Divorced from Conflict in “Game of Thrones”
House Stark- an interfaith family from a medieval-based fantasy world
“Game of Thrones,” HBO’s new hit series based on George R. R. Martin’s A Song of Ice and Fire fantasy novels, is quickly speeding towards the climax of season one. I’m hooked, and in the midst of reading the books. It’s easily my favorite television show currently in production.
At first, I was reticent to start watching. Like with my Italian heritage dictating the way I feel about “Boardwalk Empire,” my Jewish heritage reminds me that the medieval ages, which have been taken out of history and placed into this fantasy world, was not a good time for the Jews. Why should I celebrate this cultural worldview where my ancestors were mercilessly persecuted?
But however similar some aspects of Martin’s fictional world of Westeros are to our own Middle Ages (lords ruling over ancestral lands, bannermen bound in service to them, knights in tournaments and a distinct lack of the industrial age,) the role of religion, at least so far, is very different. (Warning—links below contain book spoilers!)
Westeros, the continent where most of the story takes place, has two major religions. The first, a somewhat pagan, individual worship of nature spirits, was the culture of the native Children of the Forest, then adapted by the first batch of conquerors, the First Men. Thousands of years later a second group, the Andals, also invaded, bringing with them the Faith of the Seven, a religion filled with pomp and ceremony, akin to Roman Catholicism. The Andals pushed the First Men to the North of the kingdom, and this is the only realm where worship of the Old Gods is still paramount.
When the story opens, however, there doesn’t seem to be much conflict between the two faiths. Unlike in “Caprica,” fiery prophets and clerics aren’t sent from north to south to convert people or spread terror in the name of deities. The main protagonists of the story, the Stark family, are even interfaith!
Lady Catelyn Tully Stark, the matriarch of the northern Stark family, was born in the middle of Westeros. Sometimes uncomfortable near the sacred Weirwood tree where her husband, Lord Eddard Stark, takes time to reflect on life, she still worships her own gods. Her children, my fellow mixies, go back and forth between the two sets of worship depending on their personal tastes. None of them seem to heap the drama over their choices, as I do. Religion, in essence, is secondary in this world. It’s not what defines ethics, morality, or even pride in one’s heritage.
On the opposite side of the coin, it is also not used as a reason to go to war. And ASOIAF is defined by warfare. But I applaud Martin for inherently pointing to the truth of human conflict—humans themselves. Greed, malice, fear, vengeance. A desire for power. Religion (or family feuds or most anything else) can be used as the vehicle. But what drives it home are inherent, human fallacies.
(Granted, I’ve only finished the first book thus far. I have yet to meet the more familiarly fundamentalist R’hllor followers, Drowned God or the Faith Militant faction of Westeros’s most popular religion. Real magic will also play more of a part in books to come. There still may be time for me to eat my words in this epic story!)
Religion may not constitute a big part in “Game of Thrones”/ASOIAF, but culture certainly does. A common theme thus far seems to be that if you assimilate to the broader worldview around you, be it defined by scheming politicians of the south or bloodthirsty warriors on the continent of Essos, you have a much better chance at a long and happy life than if you don’t. Ah, there’s the medieval worldview that I remember. Excuse me as I gather up my Tenach and Talmud, and study my religious texts silently, behind closed doors in the dark. :-/
But this series ultimately isn’t about one culture vs another—it’s about individuals, and the ways that they clash with each other based on their personal values, strengths and weaknesses. Martin (and television creators David Benoiff and D.B. Weiss) understand better than most that people are complicated; no one has the ultimate say over “good” or “evil.” This, far and away, sets “Game of Thrones”/ASOIAF apart from most other fantasy stories—and medieval groupies—that are out there.
“Game of Thrones” airs on HBO Sundays at 9 pm EST.
April 30, 2011
Passover Book Review: “Our Haggadah: Uniting Traditions for Interfaith Families”
Moment of truth—though writers and journalists Cokie and Steve Roberts live but just 20 minutes away from me, and have been doing a great deal of book promotion in the DC metro area, I didn’t really think much about this book until, by chance, I was waiting for a friend in the neighborhood Borders a week or so before Passover, and I saw the book on display. I decided then and there that this might be a good way to engage my parents in Passover in a way that might be applicable to our family.
But the Roberts Passover Haggadah isn’t so much about that. Part Haggadah and part memoir, it jumps from some biographical information (Steve grew up as a “cultural” Jew and Cokie was his Catholic wife who wanted to re-start the Passover tradition for the family,) to the contents of the seder ceremony (somewhat truncated and peppered with explanations of Jewish life and practice for those who need it,) and parts recipe book. There wasn’t much mention of the interfaith nature of this seder, beyond the fact that many intermarried friends have been attending for years, except for an InterfaithFamily.com-attributed mention that some folks put an artichoke on the seder plate to signify the “thorniness” in the way that interfaith families have been treated by the larger Jewish community. (Also, there’s a reminder that Moses’s wife, Zipporah, was surely no Heeb! )
All in all, however, I came to respect that an interfaith spin wasn’t superimposed on top of the seder, in the way that one might reach out and find parallels between the plights of African American or the LGBT communities. Dual heritage folks haven’t faced the same sort of persecution as these groups, or certainly the Jews. To add that in as an overarching theme would have cheapened the experience.
In the end, this book/Haggadah had a far more universal message. I gave it to my mom when I went to Baltimore for an early seder with my parents, and she tore through it. At the end of reading, she remarked on how “accessible” the seder was to her, because it was filled with personal ideas and connections to the tradition. Later, our “mock” seder consisted of eating matzah and philosophizing about the Exodus story.
At the end of the day, I wonder if we got Passover more right than the “by-the-book” Jews who just droned through the same memorized story they’ve been telling for 40 years. Steve and Cokie’s seder is a huge success, with so many prominent Washingtonian people in attendance that it landed them this book deal, and the secret to their success is that they’ve been catering the seder to their personal experiences. They cook lamb and Greek finger foods that hearkens back both to the Paschal lamb and their time living in Greece. They’ve included African spirituals for their Black guests, and to link the two histories of slavery and redemption. They say “next year in Bethesda,” because within this tiny enclave in Montgomery County, Md., they and their guests have found a place to call home. In short, the Passover story remains relevant to them. They’ve kept the original themes, but adapted it to their lives.
I’ve never felt worthy to lead a seder. I’ve been attending them for as long as I can remember, but I still find myself blanking most of the time on the order of the ceremony, or the names of everything on the seder plate. However, perhaps with some planning and insight, I can make something memorable. I’d like to find a way to proactively link myself and my parents to this rich tradition. And I think the answer’s not in the details. The answer is in making the story of the Jews applicable to you and your family today, as they Jewish people continue to evolve, survive and thrive.
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